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Wednesday, June 12, 2013

Insta-friends....just add water?

Ok....so it may not be quite as easy as "just add water" but it is fairly close. I have often pondered on why or how my friends in expat life become like family so quickly. My husband and I have moved multiple times within the United States as well as two postings outside. Each time we move I think, "Really? The company wants us to go there? Ugh." Then, each time we leave, I am sad to say good-bye to the location, friends, and all that became our day to day normal. Also, each time we move I wonder how long it will take to make new friends. When will I have those one or two people who I can call at a moment's notice, drop in on without warning, and feel 100% relaxed and at ease with? Thankfully, I have been able to find those people everywhere we live. (19 years of marriage and 7 different locations, if you are wondering) That said, saying good-bye to this group of friends has been the hardest so far. 
Why? Now that is a question I am not sure how to answer. One reason would have to be that they are just incredible, funny, smart, amazing women. (Phew...got that out of the way. Hopefully, I earn some friendship bonus points) Two, is that we all have a spirit of adventure and a love for travel. You simply have to in order to say "Yes" to moving your family to India for two to eight years. Three, is that we are expats. Expats just seem to build instant families the minute they hit foreign soil. We are strangers in a strange land. We often look, dress, speak and eat different from the locals. Thus, we are quickly drawn to one another. We need other expats to tell us where to find groceries, how to hire staff (that's a whole separate blog...coming soon), where to send our kids to school, and the list goes on and on. These woman have been my support system for three years, answering many of the previous questions, or floundering around with me until we figure them out.
Another reason I feel this group became so tight so quickly is India. Seriously, I have been thinking about this for some time now. India is a difficult country. Language, culture, infrastructure or lack of, and food are all different from anywhere else I have ever been. The majority of the time I have loved our three year adventure in India. There are also the days where all I want to do is scream out of frustration, pack my bags, and head home....wherever that is. Fellow expats will understand this. Only people who have been there/done that can understand when you are complaining about the lack of privacy due to too much staff. What sounds like whining and crying to someone in our home country comes across as a valid issue to another expat in India. And usually that other person has a story that is just a little worse and more annoying that what I had been through. Selfishly, that always makes me feel a little better.

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